My Mom’s Famous Beef Stew
Brock Malcolm
The First bite I had, filled with succulent and just complete goodness. It was the dumplings, filled with juices from everything in the bowl, mixed together to create the best dumpling ever. The Main part of the meal was the beef. It was perfect, the juices held up in the meat, soaking in the juices of the carrots and dumplings. The second bite I had was a mix of the Dumplings and the Beef; it was almost like a Philly Sandwich. The Carrots were the third thing I had, soggy with the soup, still it was delicious.
The side of this meal was also very amazing, it was homemade garlic bread. It was the best I’ve ever had; the garlic was perfect, not too little and not too much. The bread was warm, chewy, and not hard, it was just perfect.
I made a sandwich out of this meal, I cut the bread in half, put the dumplings and the beef in it, the drizzled the soup over the bread, the first bite I took, the first thing I tasted, was the warmth of the dumplings, as plump as they were, the soup leaked out of the dumplings and into the bread, so every bite no matter what was still very delectable. The beef was soggy too now, juices dripping out of my mouth. I ate every last bite of this meal and it was the best meal I have ever had.
In your first sentence where you say "just complete goodness" is awkward to read and doesn't flow that well. I would suggestise more descriptive words or descriptive line because it would make this so much stronger. Your relation to philly sandwich is very very effective in it. Your second paragraph is telling but shoe more with more descriptive words and this piece will be stronger. Your ending is very strong and makes me hungry. Thanks and well written!(;
ReplyDeleteI love your first sentence when you use the words: "succulent" and "complete goodness". One sentence that didnt make sense was "It was perfect, the juices held up in the meat,soaking in the juices of the carrots and dumplings." ( 1st Paragraph) I think you had too many "juice" words in that one sentence. It didnt flow properly.And at the very last paragraph when you said the juices just dripped out of your mouth: i liked that sentence because it sounded yummy! it was very visual! Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDelete